Signs: Heeded and Ignored.

The Mormon wanted me to meet his mentor.

He had discovered a class about writing a solo performance piece. In this class, he was developing and writing a play about the event he described to me on our walk around Union Square. I was thrown a bit by this information. Not so much as by his sharing his story (who am I to judge that?) but the underlying desire to perform that seemed to be lurking not so far beneath the surface. After my past experience with the Actor, I was hesitant to get involved with another. But the Mormon seemed so different. He asked questions. He looked at me. He wanted my opinion about things.

I also discovered how my friend, the Perpetually Recovering Addict, and the Mormon knew each other. They met at New York's GLBQT Center. In a Sexual Compulsives Anonymous Group.

I wasn't really aware of that the fact that there was such a group. And in my head, sexual compulsion means you're going around having sex with as many people as possible as much as possible. Not so. It also compromises people who are addicted to internt porn and it gets in their way of achieving intimacy with others. Hmmm. That sounds familiar. The Mormon didn't seem afraid of intimacy. Not that I had noticed yet. But it was still new.

So, he wants to be an actor and he's addicted to internet porn. Check. Check. We're made for each other.

Signs: ignored.

Our date to meet the mentor is at the Lincoln Center Cinemas. We're all going to see Brokeback Mountain together. I'm hoping this time will work out a little better than the last.

The Mormon has a truck so he's picked me up in Brooklyn with my overnight bag because we're going to spend the weekend in a house he's renovating in Cold Springs, NY. As we're walking down the street, the cold air cutting a chill right through me he asks, "Are you nervous?"

About meeting the mentor?

"No. About spending a weekend away together."

No. Should I be? You're not a serial killer are you?

"No. It's just...do you think it's too soon?"

No. I think we'll find out.

He smiles at me. I have given the right answer.

And I wasn't scared. I think things progress naturally. If I didn't want to go up with him, I wouldn't have. But it felt right. I liked spending time with him. I liked getting to know him and the more I found out, the more I liked.

The Mentor shows up and she's a tiny, wiry, wisp of a woman. She had achieved great success in the 70s with a one woman show that started at the Public and then moved off-Broadway for an extended run. She is warm, smart, thoughtful and funny. She's well-spoken. And she seems to truly connect with the Mormon. She believes in his writing. I take this as a good sign.

Brokeback was sold out so we decided to go see Match Point. Woody Allen cast two very attractive people who aren't very good actors and certainly not good enough to improv. After a while, the movie became them having the same fight over and over again so that I was finally happy when the shotgun came out.

After the movie, we shared a quick bite and the Mormon and I headed off to Cold Spring.

On the ride up, he turned to me and asked how I felt about religion. I was taken aback. No one had ever asked me this question outside of a religion class, and that was in high school. I was raised Catholic. We went to Church every Sunday. Well, Dad and I did. Mom said she had to stay home to get dinner ready for the week. After high school, I only went to church for weddings, christenings and funerals. After I came out, my dad stopped going saying he wouldn't support an institution that didn't recognize his son. Sweet. But I think he just didn't want to go anymore either and I gave him a good excuse.

I don't know, I said. I think I'm spiritual. I don't find God in church. I find him in myself when I'm doing yoga or kickboxing and my whole body is working and doing things I didn't imagine possible. I find that I stop thinking and go some place else inside of myself. I think I find God in other people too...

And I trailed off. Because I wasn't entirely sure.

"Religion is very important to me. Spirituality. It's important that I date someone who feels the same way."

Sign: ignored.

"What's important to you?"

Again, a question I've never had to field in a relationship.

Someone who's active, takes care of themselves. Someone who is confident and knows who they are and knows what they want. Someone who pays attention. Someone who knows how to laugh.

The rest of the trip is spent pretty much in reflective silence. The night passes quickly by the passenger seat window. There are few overhead lights on this narrow road we're on and I watch the broken white lines pass underneath us through the glow of the headlights. I play a game in my mind that I used to as a kid in my dad's car. I pretend I'm running and I have to keep up with the car, at the same speed, and jump on every other white line. If the line is solid, I can just run. It feels like flying if you let yourself go.